Handfasting

First, read <help marriage> and <help relationships> before you consider undertaking RPing this!!!

Handfasting is a custom in this era of two people pledging (or being pledged, if the parents arrange it) to be married on a trial basis for a year. A proper courtship and often engagement period should precede the handfasting. The intent is it would become a permanent union/marriage at the end of the year after the handfasting. The term comes from the ritual, where the couple joins hands and their hands are then wrapped together with a cloth, string of flowers, or something similar to signify the union. Often it would be something the lady made herself and would be worn in some fashion after to signify the union. Of course there would be witnesses and an appropriate priest/priestess, clan leader, or such would perform the ceremony.

Couples would, of course, seek the blessing of a priest of their god/goddess, their families, perhaps guild members if they have other commitments before. Also of note, this is generally limited to commoners. Nobility or the rich generally have arranged marriages. With their property and power at stake, they would expect those unions to be permanent from the outset. Even beyond their nobility, knights would be too chivalrous and consider it less than honorable to enter what might be only a temporary marriage that might leave the lady dishonored.

It should be considered a commitment according to your characters' alignment and beliefs and RP accordingly is expected. We do NOT approve of handfasting (or marriage of course) for characters who barely know each other. Keep in mind that even 10 days of online time is roughly only equal to 60 days in game and characters rarely spend a majority of that time with any one person or have very good opportunities to find out what they are really like. Think about the times you're not playing - the other is off on adventurers who knows where with who knows who doing who knows what. How much do you really know about them given the frequency and length of times you're apart versus together. Would a character who has only spend a few hours or even days with someone over the course of a few months actually be ready to make a commitment and/or take the risk that the other might be an entirely different person than they think? The other may be just be using you for protection, a front to hide what they really are, or just be a slut, etc. If there are significant level differences, we also look at the likelihood of abuse of inappropriate levels of protection, gear proliferation, etc. under the premise of “love” which does not excuse it.

Read <help marriage> AND <help relationships> if you haven't yet. IF (AFTER carefully reviewing the above and the other helps) you still decide you want to request to undertake handfasting, you should have appropriate IC witnesses and notify an immortal so we can be aware of the intent. We will most likely ask pointed questions, so please don't waste our time if this isn't serious RP.

Note: Having children that would appear in game is not an option due to rules issues.

See also: marriage, roleplaying, relationships, divorce